I Gotta Be Me!

This is something that I have struggled with most of my life. Most of the time I lost the struggle, on the negative side, coming away with feelings of inadequacy and low self-worth. I have often thought that because I am not ‘perfect’ that I have nothing to offer the community and have refrained from stepping into to my role as a Light bringer and Healer.

Somewhere along the line I got the notion that I had to repress (or purge) all ‘dark’ emotions or energies in order to help others in the manner I was chosen. Recently this notion has begun to change. I am starting to realize that I am a whole person, good, bad and ugly.

Whilst I have no desire to cater to the dark times or moods, I now understand that I do need to acknowledge them, embrace them, allow them to flow through and then out of me, naturally. They are as much a part of me as happiness and joy and, in fact, do serve a purpose, normally in the form of a life lesson. I can then take what I have learned and pass it along to others in the hopes that it will help them.

Now this may be a touchy subject and it is not my intent to offend or create strife, however I feel the need to say it as kindly and politely as I can.

I have read things on my FB feed that would lead me to believe that there are those that feel if you are not a born and bred Pagan/Wiccan/Heathen, ect..  That you have no business offering your services as a healer/advisor to the community, especially if you are a solitary practitioner.  To be honest I find the attitude (if true) to be elitist and arrogant.

I spent ten years as a Priest serving my local community (Non-Pagan) for a year I served as a High Priest serving that same local community. In these capacities I served as a counselor, healer, mediator, life coach, teacher and motivational speaker.  I lead three small groups concurrently, one of which I  co-founded and is still in existence and thriving today. I am no stranger to performing ritual, rites of passage, wiccanans, blessings, handfastings and other priestly services and duties, all with integrity and honor.

Including those years I have 35 years of experience dealing with life’s twists and turns, ups and down, ins and outs. I have looked Death square in the eyes, twice and lived to tell about it. I have survived abuse, neglect, homelessness, repo’s, bankruptcy, job loss, illness and the destruction of my family life on two occasions. I am still alive and kicking, my desire to serve has not diminished, it has only gotten stronger and it is time that I step into my calling and serve my Purpose once again.

 

None of these experience make me‘special’ or more (or less) qualified to serve they have only prepared me to serve and it is the Pagan community I feel called to serve and that is what I intend to do because I gotta be me!